More About Wild Elderberries

As a teenager, my Dad got me a job in a factory which manufactured food products, including peanut butter, relish, jelly and coffee. The jobs ranged from unloading sixty pound sacks of sugar or one hundred pound bags of coffee beans from railroad freight cars in the summer heat, to working on the end of an assembly line stacking 24 pound boxes of peanut butter as they rattled and clanked down a conveyor belt to be taken away by a cigarette smoking forklift operator, to cleaning sixteen bathrooms in a day. Fun stuff.

So my job on this one particular day was to take large metal tins of wild elderberries and smash the top open with a large ball peen hammer (hit right in the middle) and then dump the twenty five or so pounds of wild elderberries into a large metal hopper where they dropped to a cooker located on floor below. At some point in the process, large amounts of sugar were added, which was contained in bins the size of a mid-sized uhaul truck.

As the day progressed, I wearily smashed open one tin after another of wild elderberries, sending them on their way to be cooked and put into jars, labeled, boxed and stacked on wooden pallets by some other poor soul who had drawn that particularly back breaking job for the day. Once a line was put in operation, it did not stop for much of anything, and therefore it was a stunningly pleasant surprise to have a white shirt and tie walk up to me and tell me to cease operations for the time being.

Seems that several floors below mine, a group of four women with latex gloves on, sat at a long metal trough with wild elderberry jelly running through it, and fished through it nonstop, looking for anything which might not belong therein. And in the course of such searching, they began to detect items variously described as fur or bone fragments, admittedly NOT an intended part of the advertised product.

OK, so I was a college kid, a bosses brat and a well acknowledged smartass, but it did not take a college education (in progress) to figure out what had happened. For some reason, the company tolerated or even encouraged the presence of a number of cats in the factory, perhaps for cheap rodent control or to help the workers forget the slave-like existence many endured for years. And yes, one such was VERY pregnant and inhabited the sixth floor in the vicinity of the huge sugar bins. And it had been noted earlier in the day that said cat was no longer pregnant and that the location of her nest was thus far undiscovered.

My suggestion that they should NOT scrap the entire output for the day, but should merely re-label the product “Wild Elderberry Jelly Fortified with Kitten Parts” was not greeted with either grateful thanks, nor whoops of amusement, and in fact it is very likely that only my Dad’s position with the firm prevented me from being fired or beheaded.

But I still think it was a fair suggestion, and it would have saved them from losing an entire day’s output of Wild Elderberry Jelly.

Hello, Goodbye

Who would have believed a long weekend could pass so quickly.

Thanks BG for another few days filled with wonderful memories!

Reason Number 73,548...

...why my respect for the FAA is at the level it is.

Flying westbound along the south shore of Long Island this morning with a lovely companion visiting from Mississippi with me, and after a quick visit to look at the traffic in the Hamptons, we had proceeded past Smith Point. The bumps had subsided, there were two full tanks of gas, nobody was nauseous and the visibility was quite good. We could clearly see Connecticut.

So I called and asked the following question: "Does the restricted airspace for the Jones Beach airshow extend as far east as the Robert Moses lighthouse, over." The astute amongst you will note that this is a question which requires a YES or NO response.

"Restricted area 7493 is a 5 nautical mile radius around a point 17.8 miles from the Deer Park VOR on the 138 radial, said restriction in effect currently until 1900 hours zulu."

'Roger'. I turned around and came home.

Friend of a Friend

More accurately, the Best Friend of my Best Friend, was lovingly laid to rest today.

Tennison The Wonder Dog was good company for the woman I love for virtually all of her adult life. He had a long (13 years) and love-filled life thanks to the caring devotion of his best friend. He lived long and he lived well and he will be remembered with affection, tenderness and happiness for years to come.

I shall miss him too. Very much.

Boys Toys

DDDD Different Day, Different Drains

DDDD (Different Drains, Different Day)

Today we are on a main County north-south road which runs from the Atlantic Ocean on one end to the bridge to Connecticut on the other end which they never built. This road is actually quite favored by serious bicycle riders, and is also popular with 22 wheel gravel trucks who devoutly believe that 75 mph is an ok speed in a 55 mile zone, despite knowing it would take them six city blocks to stop.
Note that the engineers have not only taken the entire bike path for their drain, but additionally have cleverly made any escape impossible with a guard rail situated to the right.





Next, an opportunity to develop a new ‘skill set’ *gag* of “precision” riding. Note that the normal mountain bike tire would have less than ONE INCH of clearance on either side of this path.




And the best for last. Piece de Resistance. The “green” highway engineers have pretty much outdone themselves on this one. Note that the holes in the drain are specially designed to parallel the path of the bicycle wheel, ensuring that it is absolutely impossible to drive over it at any speed.



But wait, there’s more! This particular bike killer is also, and at the same time, located right at the base of an entrance ramp, so that with any luck, accelerating vehicles will be looking left over their shoulder for southbound traffic and not paying ANY attention to bicycles on the shoulder who HAVE to veer into the roadway or die.



Thanks guys!

More Like It

Now, out in the Hamptons, the drains do not overlap the bike lane. And, you have the Atlantic Ocean on the left, and osprey nests and the bay and wetlands on the right, and if an SUV hits you, they are more apt to be rich.